Post by Adrian J. Watts on Dec 27, 2005 19:31:48 GMT -5
www.buzzscope.com/previewer.php?id=5333&p=1
Here's how Marvel describes the issue:
Spider-Woman's dark secrets revealed!! Captain America catches her double-dealing the Avengers and corners her! How did Spider-Woman get her powers back and to whom does she answer? It’s all here!!
A Spider-Woman-focused storyline? Sounds like a job for superstar, award-winning comic artist FRANK CHO!
Here's how *I* describe the issue:
Now, I know comic book women tend to be... oddly proportioned. They have backs that arc at strange angles and legs that make them look like they've spent their lives walking like cowboys, just to name a few issues (and yes, we all know there are many more).
Is it just me, though, or are Jessica Drew's breasts looking decidedly screwed-up on the front cover? Has Frank Cho (David Finch?) ever actually seen breasts? I really don't think they look like that.
Her arms aren't too great, either - her muscle definition is only on one side (I know, we can only really SEE one side of her arms, but we can tell by the overall shape that she has no definition on the other side). She looks, actually, like a very under-developed bodybuilder whose arms can only curl inward - as though she can only do THIS:
Once again, Kat Farrel is inconsistent and incompetent. First of all, she doesn't do what she normally does: ie, believe the incredible. Secondly, she speaks like a fool.
"What does that mean: a building lit up?"
Stupid BENDIS!. Actually say that out loud, including the appropriate pause for the colon, and listen to how stupid it sounds. NOBODY speaks like that unless they have a speech disability. PERHAPS without the colon. PERHAPS with the colon but not the bold. But not with both.
But the real issue with that piece of dialogue - and the reason that we know it is poorly delivered - is because of the context. Kat's mother had already told her a building lit up. Anyone with half a brain would issume the lights had turned on in the middle of the day or there was a fire/explosion. In fact, Kat assumes something quite similar.
So why does she speak like a moron when questioning her mother?
And WTF is it with BENDIS! and parentheses? Is that meant to be an aside? Then why not stick with tradition and use hyphens? Or is it meant to be dialogue only we can secretly hear? Or whispering? WTF?
Then we get to see outside and... what building has lit up? There is a light, and not a very bright one, above the Watchtower. Sooooo.... yeah.... And the reporters look dumbstruck - they must all be NEW at the Bugle.
Then we have a scene with Cap and Jessica. The solicitation tells us that "Captain America catches her double-dealing the Avengers and corners her." Well, no he doesn't. He caught her an issue ago (wow, the pace IS picking up a bit - I thought he wouldn't "corner her" for another two years at least) and is now cornering her.
And their conversation makes little sense, both in its overall content and its linguistic structure.
CA: What does Madame Hydra have over you?
SW: She's part of it.
CA: WHO?
First, we'll look at the dialogue of the page overall. Cap is asking who Jessica is working for. She then says Madame Hydra is part of "it" - as though WHO she is working for is an IT of more than one part. WRONG.
As far as that snippet goes, we can look at it in two ways:
1) Cap is a moron. Has he never questioned someone before? Jessica has offered him a very valuable bit of information. "She's [Madame Hydra] part of it." PART of IT. There is something much larger at play. Grab onto that, Cap. But no... clearly, since Cho has shown us his head is only about 2% bigger than his bicep, Cap is an idiot and just goes back to his original question (which was actually being answered to a degree).
2) BENDIS! can't write dialogue. Jessica says "She's part of it." and Cap says "WHO?" meaning either "WHO's part of it?" or "WHO are the IT that Madame Hydra is part of?"
God I hate BENDIS!.
You ALL know I could keep going.
- Adrian
P.S. - Just for future reference, in addition to (Spoilers) I am going to put (B!H) in the subject line of future posts full of BENDIS! hate.
Here's how Marvel describes the issue:
Spider-Woman's dark secrets revealed!! Captain America catches her double-dealing the Avengers and corners her! How did Spider-Woman get her powers back and to whom does she answer? It’s all here!!
A Spider-Woman-focused storyline? Sounds like a job for superstar, award-winning comic artist FRANK CHO!
Here's how *I* describe the issue:
Now, I know comic book women tend to be... oddly proportioned. They have backs that arc at strange angles and legs that make them look like they've spent their lives walking like cowboys, just to name a few issues (and yes, we all know there are many more).
Is it just me, though, or are Jessica Drew's breasts looking decidedly screwed-up on the front cover? Has Frank Cho (David Finch?) ever actually seen breasts? I really don't think they look like that.
Her arms aren't too great, either - her muscle definition is only on one side (I know, we can only really SEE one side of her arms, but we can tell by the overall shape that she has no definition on the other side). She looks, actually, like a very under-developed bodybuilder whose arms can only curl inward - as though she can only do THIS:
Once again, Kat Farrel is inconsistent and incompetent. First of all, she doesn't do what she normally does: ie, believe the incredible. Secondly, she speaks like a fool.
"What does that mean: a building lit up?"
Stupid BENDIS!. Actually say that out loud, including the appropriate pause for the colon, and listen to how stupid it sounds. NOBODY speaks like that unless they have a speech disability. PERHAPS without the colon. PERHAPS with the colon but not the bold. But not with both.
But the real issue with that piece of dialogue - and the reason that we know it is poorly delivered - is because of the context. Kat's mother had already told her a building lit up. Anyone with half a brain would issume the lights had turned on in the middle of the day or there was a fire/explosion. In fact, Kat assumes something quite similar.
So why does she speak like a moron when questioning her mother?
And WTF is it with BENDIS! and parentheses? Is that meant to be an aside? Then why not stick with tradition and use hyphens? Or is it meant to be dialogue only we can secretly hear? Or whispering? WTF?
Then we get to see outside and... what building has lit up? There is a light, and not a very bright one, above the Watchtower. Sooooo.... yeah.... And the reporters look dumbstruck - they must all be NEW at the Bugle.
Then we have a scene with Cap and Jessica. The solicitation tells us that "Captain America catches her double-dealing the Avengers and corners her." Well, no he doesn't. He caught her an issue ago (wow, the pace IS picking up a bit - I thought he wouldn't "corner her" for another two years at least) and is now cornering her.
And their conversation makes little sense, both in its overall content and its linguistic structure.
CA: What does Madame Hydra have over you?
SW: She's part of it.
CA: WHO?
First, we'll look at the dialogue of the page overall. Cap is asking who Jessica is working for. She then says Madame Hydra is part of "it" - as though WHO she is working for is an IT of more than one part. WRONG.
As far as that snippet goes, we can look at it in two ways:
1) Cap is a moron. Has he never questioned someone before? Jessica has offered him a very valuable bit of information. "She's [Madame Hydra] part of it." PART of IT. There is something much larger at play. Grab onto that, Cap. But no... clearly, since Cho has shown us his head is only about 2% bigger than his bicep, Cap is an idiot and just goes back to his original question (which was actually being answered to a degree).
2) BENDIS! can't write dialogue. Jessica says "She's part of it." and Cap says "WHO?" meaning either "WHO's part of it?" or "WHO are the IT that Madame Hydra is part of?"
God I hate BENDIS!.
You ALL know I could keep going.
- Adrian
P.S. - Just for future reference, in addition to (Spoilers) I am going to put (B!H) in the subject line of future posts full of BENDIS! hate.
